Life this week has been pretty mundane- packing box after box of my life- trying to decide what to store and what to take with us. Of course everything takes ages as I find long lost letters, cards, magazines etc and have to stop and read them.
An ex work colleague who is also packing and moving has been posting on Facebook about having a 'come and take away party', of selling things on ebay and sending loads to charity shops. I admire her ability to do this. Part of me longs to just give it all away, to move unfettered by so much 'stuff', but my husband is adamant that we hang on to moct things as when we move again in 2 years ( and again 4 years later) we may find a place for them and a use. I have put aside at least a dozen glasses that we really don't need and a pile of bowls to go to a charity shop. Will do the same with my clothes later.
At the same time as packing I'm finding it hard to really believe that in less than 6 weeks I will have started college, met new people and be living in a very different place to here. It all seems to be like a dream happening to someone else. I wonder if the fact that its nearly 6 years since I started walking this path that makes it feel like that.
The friends who visited the other day have just finished theological college. When I first approached my Rector to share what I believed God was saying he mentioned that there was someone else in the church considering whether God was calling him. It was a year later before I learned who the person was and a year after that when P approached the DDO. He then went for a BAP and started college within the year. He was very concerned when he had to tell me he'd been accepted knowing that I had been made to wait three years due to my remarriage. I was thrilled for P, and still am, that God had called him and he had been faithful. I also know that I have changed and have learned an awful lot in the 6 years of waiting so I am sure I am better prepared now than I was. but that wait has made it feel as if its always going to be over the horizon.
In some ways I am reminded of Moses and the Israelites wandering in the wilderness for 40 years- and Moses didnst get to go into the promised land when they got there! But for the Israelites who had heard over and over how God had led them out of Egypt to take them to a promised land and finally they got there! I wonder if they really dared believe that this is it. Well they did make it into the promised land and I know I am going to make it to Theological College and to the life God has called me to follow.