Waiting

So here we are, Advent has started and we are waiting. Waiting for the second coming of our Lord, waiting for Christmas and the birth of our Saviour, waiting for the end of term, waiting to see family again, waiting to hear more about curacy. The sermon on Sunday morning given by my friend the other sacristan, talked about NOT being busy because Jesus is coming. He suggested taking time to prepare, time to be silent, time to wait on God and listen to Him as we prepare for Christmas. I would love to take a couple of days for a silent retreat but can't see it happening anytime soon.
However I will be spending a few days up north, seeing my curacy again, spending a day with other Ordinands and the Bishop, enjoying company of friends and family and then back to college to write the rest of my last portfolio and starting the reading for my dissertation. then once Christmas is over I shall return to Lancashire with two of my sons to visit my mum. All great fun.
When we return to college in January we have just 5 months before we leave and begin the next stage of this wonderful journey. Yikes 5 months- will I really be ready!! Well after all the waiting to get here I trust that God will have done the work He wanted in me and that I will be ready to let Him take me on to the next stage. I will never be ready to go it on my own. That is one of the things I become more and more aware of, the deep need I have to rely on God and let his Holy Spirit lead me.

Thankfulness

It's been a while since I posted partly through a rather busy life. I've also been trying to complete my next portfolio and still have some way to go on it. However reading a friends blog she talks about thankfulness.and it made me think about what I have to be thankful for. This is particularly important for me at the moment as college life isn't easy and it is so easy to slip into negativity and forget all the wonderful things God has done for me. So here goes with a few things I have to be thankful for:
A wonderful husband
Living in a beautiful place and being on the 4th floor having spectacular sunsets to watch
The friendships both here at college and around the world
Three wonderful sons, and two lovely step-daughters and 4 grand children
A very supportive mother who is always ready to listen
Two great sisters
What looks likely to be just the right curacy for me
Good health
God's love which is expressed in all the above
And much much more
Now to go and enjoy some more

Called to be Incarnate

One of the questions asked of anyone considering ordained ministry is - why must you be ordained to serve God'? A good question and one which each ordinand has struggles with. My own answer had in it an element of wanting to bring God to the people and the people to God and therefore an element of called to be incarnate- as Jesus was God incarnate. Today I have read the following quote on a blog I had just started reading
' God calls us to follow and journey, but He also asks us to settle and be incarnate in the community we are and to show them His presence'It really made me stop and think. I believe I am called to be incarnate as a curate and a vicar but have I really taken on board what it means to be incarnate amongst the people I now live wit? Am I truly trying to be Jesus to the college Community? If we all were truly living out that calling here at college would college look any different to how it does today? K my husband often moans about what he sees as unchristian attitudes among other ordinands. I'm not going to comment on that. Rather I am going to reflect and pray that I would truly be what God has called me to be amongst this community for the remaining months. Its not something I should be thinking I will take up once I'm in curacy!

Worship

College life for the past week has been busy ( So what's new?!)
Our group was responsible for leading worship over last week and then today I was responsible for planning and leading the mornings Group worship. On Friday evening I planned and led a Service of the Word- an alternative to our college regular pattern of Common Worship or BCP evening prayer. The idea is to plan a service which would be pretty standard in an average parish church that didn't use straight evening prayer. I really enjoyed the challenge, and in fact used a standard structure from evening prayer but used modern songs and hymns rather than plain song and canticles. The comments I have received back have been positive which is always encouraging.
Then this morning I planned an act of worship for the group around Isaiah 6, using an interactive reading of the scripture and then various stations around the room to encourage people to reflect and pray on the reading. Again I really enjoyed the experience of planning this worship. In fact I know that the opportunity to plan and lead worship is something that makes me feel alive and fulfilled in a way that writing essays- however much I may be interested in the topic - doesn't. I'm having to sit hard on my patience as I wait for the time when I shall have finished college and be out living the life I feel called to.
In the meantime -back to that essay!

A quiet interlude!

Normally yesterday would have been the first quiet day of the term. Last year that involved total silence around the college buildings from compline on Tuesday evening until 8.30am on Thursday. However this term due to other events in college the day became condensed. We met for compline on Tuesday evening and then a talk from +Michael, followed by silence. Wednesday we were in silence from waking and had morning prayer followed by +Michael's second talk then a couple of hours for reflection followed by silent lunch, service in the middle of the day and third talk by +Michael. Then just an hour later the bell went for the end of silence and we collected outside near the new building s for the blessing of the stones. This was a celebration of the college and the new building work. From that those of us in the choir or altar party went to church for rehearsals. This was followed at 5.15pm with a Service for All Souls.
The quiet day retreats are never easy in college but this last one has been anything but retreat like. We seemed to rush from one place to another not just physically but spiritually without time to reflect and absorb what we had heard. The change as well from quiet reflection, to celebration and back to the reflective requiem style service left us all a little disorientated.
Our thoughts have been fed back - and I do appreciate that it was an unusual combination of events that wouldn't normally happen. It reminded us all that when working in parishes we need to carry a single thought through a service.
After all that I am shattered and wishing it was half term this weekend and that I had been sensible and booked a few days away instead of staying in college and doing placement on Sunday.